Thursday, December 23, 2010

You had to know, there was a Part Two

    So I was super excited with my parent's survival guide, and ready to share it with the people, that I actually come in contact with, and damn it, lo and behold, they have more rules to add. Figures. this is the Parent's Survival Guide to Christmas 2: My personal guide :)

  • In honor of my friend, Tricia...when giving gifts to your nieces, nephews, etc, etc...Be sure to purchase gifts that are obnoxious and loud. I think a drum set would be perfect.
  • When you are in the hospitality business like myself, the last thing on your mind is browsing through the Hallmark store. I did it today, for WAYYY to long. Wow, how hard is it to buy a freaking gift. Apparently really hard, because I was there for 45 minutes.
  • Shopping in itself is painful tough. I could walk around, and around, and around with a "can you help me face on?" but where are the people that are paid to help you? Exactly!
  • Why are they so many candle options? Did we really need a "dune grass" smell? It took me 20 minutes to capture each girl that I worked with. Do you see the insanity in that?
  • Why, when there is just hours left in shopping, I am tweaking like some kind of junkie? I am ready to buy my next door neighbor the barbecue sauce that, he was unable to get in July?
  • I am caught up into the cattle herd we call Christmas, and staring at Hallmark displays, and for far too long. Bad combination..girl desperate, with a pocket full of money who's betting blind.
  • Oops, forgot completely about Christmas dinner, never mind that yesterday, I ordered 2 dozen eggrolls in the snow, in the parking lot of Price Chopper, but that was only because I recognized the guy as "Eddie's Dad", I just need to remember, pick up at 150 maple street, after 2pm. The best thing about this whole sketchy hokey deal, is that these eggrolls are freaking worth it!!! No Lie!!!!
  • Parental Units coming tomorrow, have a super cool surprise for them I am pregnant with triplets, I am a little bit more prepared then last year. With each year, I become, just a smidgen more responsible. Perfection takes time.
  • Tomorrow, I hoping that I can feed my boss some super charged bloody Mary's. Because today, for our humble area of the world we were nuts, no one wants to answer "those questions" crazy. How many different ways can I tell you, that we have no more gingerbread?
  • Guess what!!!, your kids pull out their trump cards, right about now!!, heck I was browsing, my cellphone never rang? But, I came home and my kids had a whole lotta things to say.WHY???
  • This rule is super important.. PLLLECHHHGGHHHH! Stop the insanity.
  • All I want for Christmas is to sleep in, and I am not asking for an unreasonable time frame, just until I can't comfortably sleep anymore. When you get older, it gets harder.
  • No one from this moment on mentions Monday, I get it... I am on know like coconuts and pineapple.
  • Hi, my name is Paige and I am not ready!, dang Christmas anyway!!
  • Last but not least, my hydro drink for a pointy head guy, that I affectionately call McD, boy did you cause a tsunami at the bakery. Quit Smiling!!!!!
 McD's Hot Butter Rum

1 cup unsalted butter
1 pound of powdered sugar
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground cloves
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp ground allspice
2 quarts vanilla ice cream
1 pound brown sugar, packed

In a mixer cream butter and sugars together until smooth. Add the spices and ice cream and mix until smooth. Transfer this to a freezer safe container and store for at least 1 month.  To serve, place 2 heaping tablespoons of this frozen confection in a coffee mug add 1 1/2 ounces of rum and add 6 ounces of boiled water, stir and enjoy. Dust with cinnamon and nutmeg to make it fancy.

When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking. ~ Elaine Boosler


tmac2271 said...

Hahas does that imply you're not gonna get your christmas wish this year to just get some time to relax?

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